welcome to the masquerade.

It’s amazing. One little correspondence draws me right in, gives me so much hope I’m dancing off the walls, and I don’t know what to say. And then I don’t know what to say. I mess it up. So, so easily. Because I’m so confused, out of touch, out of fluency with chatting. I could think of a million ways to respond, all would require tone and meaning, which is impossible to get across through words typed on a keyboard. So I go for the obvious, the clumsy. And end up looking like a fool. A lonely fool. This is why I so much prefer face-to-face talking. Or at least phones… not even that. I want to see you when I talk to you. To gesture, smile, to know how you react. I can’t stand it otherwise. And neither, apparently, can you.